I read an interesting study the other day. Seems some researchers were trying to divine why men - or most of them, anyway - need frequent naps. Too much testosterone say some, not enough testosterone say others; high metabolism or low blood pressure from yet another researcher; and there's always the "not enough fruits and leafy green vegetables" from the health addicts. Balderdash, I say! The answer is so simple it's a small wonder no one has figured it out, until now:
When women are out of the house their husbands spend most of the day looking for things that they can't find. Often, this frustrating quest is particularly exhausting and is the main reason for men needing frequent naps. Women, on the other hand, know where everything is. This is understandable. After all it's their nest that the husband or lover (on occasion, one and the same) lives in.
"What did you do all day while I was gone, dear?" is a frequently heard phrase around the house, particularly mine. "Did you make yourself something for lunch?"
"No time. I was too exhausted looking for that darn rejection letter from The New Yorker. Did you see it anywhere? I turned the house upside down and I really want to write that editor back, show her where she went wrong."
"Did you look in the accountant's file, dear? I seem to recall that the rejection letter and our income tax return came in the same mail. You might have mixed it in."
"I checked every single file in the cabinet and, believe me, there's no letter anywhere," I said, adamantly.
"Give me the file, let me look," she said, just as adamantly. "Why here it is, darling," she said in a thrice. "You accidentally stapled it to the amended return the accountant filed for us in '98. Want some lunch now, dear? I'll make you something."
"Okay, but I'm still too exhausted, give me a few minutes on the couch first. If I'm not up in an hour, you can wake me."
"Certainly, darling - but I'll make it half-an-hour. You know how upset you get when we miss the Early Bird."
